Parents Give and Children Take Unconditionally

This blog is dedicated to all parents and their children, including my own. It's based on the learnings, and insights gained from the collective experiences and our journey to self realization (liberation and reconstruction of our true selves). It's important to pause and give deep gratitude for the many gifts our parents, and ancestors have bestowed on us!

The goal is not to blame our parents, they too were grappling with their own versions of the generational trauma they naturally passed on. They imparted what they had and all they knew with little to no guidance or healing tools, and influence of false organized religion. It also does not disregard how or what we as their children felt or experienced. The crucial thing to realize is that it is our opportunity to heal and liberate our true selves! and potentially not pass that on to the next generation. An opportunity to regain our self love, self worth, confidence, truth, to love and be loved, and our immense power as whole (Mind, animal body, and spirit) and sovereign beings in this lifetime living the gift of life.

Love, truth, and forgiveness liberate !

The natural flow of the universe and life is for parents or primary caregivers to give unconditional love, presence, emotional support, protection/safety, sustenance, shelter, and education, and for children to take unconditionally. If those needs are not met, there is emotional neglect, the flow is reversed (parents take and children give), and/or it is accompanied by physical, sexual and emotional abuse, WARs, religious persecutions, etc. Those experiences will often result in deep emotional, mental, and somatic injuries or trauma (and false beliefs). And generally lead to fragmentation of and disconnection from the true self (the soul).

As children perceive their "survival" hinges on the love of their parents and caregivers, they experience abandonment, create false beliefs, create survival strategies and stories, and often give up parts of themselves including their boundaries in order to "survive." Those experiences form a protective armor which makes accessing their heart's wisdom, their true self, love and compassion (for themselves and others) rather difficult. Until truly healed, these injuries more than likely perpetuate the cycle of generational trauma.

Those injurious experiences often manifest themselves as false beliefs creating prison walls around true self (soul) and the wisdom of the heart. The psyche/ego will attach itself to those false beliefs as the prison guard, and creates stories, rationale, and outward strategies (artificial construct of self or a persona) to protect from future harm and pain in order to "survive" in this perceived violent and unsafe world.

The injuries resulting from those experiences will be held deep in the subconscious and the somatic body. Mind and body are one, and the body keeps score. One then continues to call in partners, people, and experiences to either fulfill those unmet needs (which could only be met by our parents), validate those false beliefs and stories (the reward), or help one heal. Relationship after relationship one pushes away people who loves them, or one loves, one closes ones heart to protect it, have disconnected or disembodied experiences, struggle with life events, try to control one's environment so one doesn't feel the pain and struggle, stay disconnected from oneself, one's heart, others, one's work, and the environment. Live an unfulfilled, painful and lonely life in struggle and in fear even when surrounded by people who love them. Because one cannot connect with or be one's true selves as one's true selves are held captive in one's prison of false beliefs.

This cycle will continue until we process and release the injurious experiences and associated beliefs (emotionally and somatically). One's parents, family, society, and religion falsely tells one to just forget it, put in a box and throw away the key, toughen up, put it behind us and just move on. Those are the biggest lies ever told. It doesn't work that way. They continue to live deep within us until they are released, healed and we learn to parent ourselves.

At times, challenges feel significant and threatening. We might feel insecure, confused, stressed, disoriented, scared, overwhelmed or even anxious and depressed. Our stories around them are unique and strongly influenced by what we believe about ourselves and the world. These limiting core beliefs (the prison walls of our soul) might be: “I’m not good enough,“ “I’m not lovable,” "I'm not worthy," “I can never let my guard down,” “I can’t express how I really feel,” “life is a struggle I must endure,” “I can’t trust anyone,” “my needs don’t matter,” "I'm powerless," "bad things always happen to me," "I cannot ask for help or receive help," "I'm all alone in this world," "I can only rely on myself," "I cannot show my true self."

We are compelled to mistake those beliefs for the truth and react when we are activated by some external event, outside of our control, and without having a choice of response. This self made prison keeps us living in a constant state of fear, scarcity, struggle, victimhood, pain and loneliness. We fear living more than dying in this state. How is it that others can live in joy, pleasure, abundance, and real connections, living their lives fully and with purpose? "they are just more fortunate than me."

How did these beliefs form and how can we "truly surrender" and let go of that which no longer serves our greater good? Once we learn to meet ourself with love, kindness, and compassion we will start to experience the freedom and power of choice and begin to reconstruct our true self, heal generations past, present and future. We can create a new state of being that is in alignment with our true self and abundance.

We live in times where there are tremendous resources and tools available to help us escape from our prison of false beliefs, stories, and struggles in life and relationships. Believing we can control events and people in order to avoid the pain and struggle within is a grand illusion. We simply cannot control anything outside our ourselves! We can try to manipulate and lie, and ultimately even that is an illusion. We are given as a birthright the greatest power ever, the power of choice. As Rumi said, “Why do you stay in prison, when the door is so wide open?”

I broke out of my prison after 50 years! and continue to knock down the walls, find the doors and windows to restore the lost parts of my true self which hold love, wisdom, and compassion. I had severe trauma and injuries in my life as a child and well into adulthood, and lived a disembodied, unfulfilled and lonely existence in fear, and armored heart. Seeking the truth and breaking out of the prison of false beliefs transformed my life into more joy, greater and deeper connections with my children, community members, and friends. I stepped into my sovereignty, found greater peace inside, love and compassion for self, and others, and was able to set and hold healthier boundaries, ask for help, receive with more grace and lead a much more fulfilling work, and sex life. I had incredible help from amazing souls (my guides and teachers including my children and partners), and the gift of healing plants from mother earth.

It takes commitment, desire for truth, courage, and help from someone who has traveled the path (a guide), who knows the tools and ways to break out this prison. I was blessed with all of that.

If you have experienced deep emotional injuries or trauma, don't believe the lies that you'll just get over it, all you have to do is forget, put it all behind you, pick up the pieces, move on, and everything will be FINE. Take a good and deep look at the life you are living now (in the present moment), and how you are living it in relationships, life experiences, and your physical and emotional state of being. It is a direct reflection of your beliefs, thoughts and actions. And a great portion of it happens without your awareness. Majority of our actions and response to events and experiences in life are on autopilot (without conscious awareness) driven by the subconscious which is governed by deeply held beliefs. Then take a deeper look inside. Can you see the prison walls of those false belief, and your true self captive in that prison? It takes great courage and commitment to seek the truth and liberate your true self. You can't keep your true self (soul) locked up forever. It will find a way to escape, if not in this life time, in the next.

Healing our selves leads to breaking out of our prison, finding our true self, truth, love and compassion, sovereignty, wisdom and ultimately forgiveness for ourselves and others. And most importantly possibly stop perpetuating the cycle of generational trauma.

Love and truth Liberate.

www.pathtoasha.com

With love, and gratitude

~Rām🙏🏽❤️✨🪶

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